The Internet Doesn’t Negate My Human Being

One day someone told me they felt they shouldn’t write on my Facebook because they thought I would not want them to. Are there barriers to communication we’re not aware of? What does “friend” on the Internet really mean?

I’m highly sensitive and always have been. I never believed anyone liked me, even as a child. I can pick out a “you’re odd” look from a mile away. I can tell when someone is standing next to me, thinking, “I don’t like her,” but they’re not saying it out loud. I can still hear it.

Being sensitive is hell when you join a place like Facebook or Twitter. I got into trouble in Facebook when I didn’t make someone my “Top Friend”. Well, for starters, I had no idea who she was! She made a real stink about it, so I removed the darned thing altogether.

I have friends on Twitter whom I know in person too. Lately, I’ve noticed they ignore me. Why is that? Did I do something to tick them off and they won’t tell me?

There are definitely groups on Twitter where you’re included, or not. I notice that sometimes I’m included and sometimes I’m talked around as if I’m not there. I’m still here. I have feelings. I’ve noticed that you no longer think I’m cool enough to talk to in front of your friends.

The meaning of “Friends” has been wrecked by social network sites. Now, we get “Followers” that we can follow or un-follow. We can add friends we’ve never met, have any clue about, and feel pressured to add because they asked you to. And if we don’t add a friend, who isn’t really a friend but more like a complete stranger, we risk hurting their feelings or getting a bad reputation.

And another thing. I can’t stand being called “fucker” on Twitter. I’ve noticed that people talk to their so-called friends with a shocking lack of respect for them. When someone calls me a “fucker”, I un-follow them. When someone swears ALL the time online, I un-follow because this is just their poison and I want no part of it. I will never start swearing to be included in someone’s group because it’s not me. Why pretend to be someone I’m not?

I’m very selective about who I associate with. I treat my friends with honor, devotion and respect. The Internet is not a place for those kinds of friendships, at least in the way I define “friends”.

And that’s a real shame.